"My Words Have Power"

Make It Real

by: Nicole Kim Phillips

Don't do the most he said.  The words bounced off the walls and echoed in my ear drums.  With a quick come back, I responded.  "Telling me not to do the most is easy, when your job is not on the line.  I want everything to be perfect, including dinner and everything leading up to the big finish"!  To prepare I told myself "no matter what, you got this; your options are unlimited" Looking in the mirror, it was not difficult for me to convince myself of anything, so I repeated that a few times, before getting into the tub.  There is nothing like a relaxing bath before some Chibs Okereke.  My body may have been calm, but my mind was trying to figure out what I would say, and how I would look, as I was speaking.  Ad lib, I said aloud.  When I watch stuff like this on TV, it seems effortless, and that is what I am going for.  I kept practicing in the mirror to get my sound and gestures right.  I realized, the unique position I was in.  Another woman could very well be here.  "Living the best possible life is everyone's dream.  I want to spend mine with you.  In making this choice, I accept that things between us will not always be perfect.  There will be moments when doubt tries to steep in, changing the course of everything familiar.  However, what I know is, I want you now and forever.  If I have to change, it will be to satisfy you better and to improve myself and perform at my best.  Sure, my goals may change, but I will include you and consult with you for input.  Your guidance and opinion are welcome.  Babe, you are more than my everything.  The cream in my coffee, and the cherry on top of any and all of my love scenes.  I'm thankful for what you have been to me.  I also understand what we can not be together.  Still, I have a pocket to go to, only existing for you and I.  

I will retreat there often, knowing that sometimes I will finish what I start alone, with you there only in the spirit of memory.  It is more than enough, for me to rely on, to fill in the gaps, separating us in space and time.  I am always happy to recall our embrace and how I look forward to you.  In your absence, I envision our perfection, and I can see you coming, through the door.  I say yes, when you call me, and no to anyone trying to take your permanent place, in my heart.  Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  Though, love can hurt, I pray I can still find my happy pocket, to retreat where only you and I can dwell, undisturbed. I can not be everything you may want, or the best at everything you need.  Knowing that, I look away with my eyes, believing I am the best I can be.  Remembering, I am in charge of my own happiness, and I will always pursue what interest me.  Even in your presence, I choose me, and no one can take me away from me.  I'm always here for me".  Suddenly, all I heard was clapping and Tyler saying, cut loudly!  Get out the mirror, take a short break; we have to do that vow scene again.  Take 2,  put a little more emphasis on...

I am an Author of a Children's Book entitled: "Visiting Granny In Mississippi" (Read my Book Summary)